We are all interested in self improvement programs.
Ways we can improve our understanding of ourselves and other people. There is a considerable selection of programs or literature available for those who wish to study the complex nature of their own mind and emotions. One of the difficulties regarding self-analysis is an inability of an individual to get a sufficiently honest look at him/herself. We often seek the remedy with the same faculties which caused the trouble. Our attitudes and basic concepts of life have somehow failed, leaving us in need of psychological assistance. We must analyze the cause of the failure in our nature and because of certain limitations and prejudices. We tend to use the faculties which lead us to the problem to rationalize the complicated situation. Unfortunately these capabilities are not sufficient.
Somehow we must attain a level from which we can examine ourselves in a new way. Unless our self examination is better than our previous conduct, we are not going to arrive at a positive solution. We sense often that we lack something that is necessary to self-guidance. Often we lack self-control, discrimination and patience.
Attachment is also a troubling aspect of ourselves, which extends nearly over all aspects of human life.
Sometimes we are too attached to the physicality of the world we live in, sometimes we are too attached to our psychic life, nearly all of us are attached to our opinions or convictions. Some of us are attached to our fears, some to hopes. Plenty of us are attached to previous mistakes and few of previous victories.
Nearly always a person is overruled by his complex personality when the person should come to a tangible conclusion herself/himself.
To escape from these shadows which can confuse our daily conduct, we must seek a broader integration of ourselves.
We tend to suffer from the problems we have created or are avoiding, we never suffer from a problem we solved. Our solution brings release to the tense issue.In search of a solution we tend to move to the opinions of others, yet often we can see that the giver of the opinion rarely lives by its rule. THerefore we cannot depend on someone's authority over our situation.
It’s better to seek for a more common and traditional answer to things, which we all subconsciously are aware of. Yet even those answers should undergo our honest consideration and discrimination.
To increase our awareness, we should understand what has influenced our growth and brought us true love & happiness. Getting to know the positive aspects of our history refreshes our memory, gives a distance to what happened, introduces us to our subconscious patterns and prepares us for more challenging analysis moving forward. Knowing what has shaped us positively will give us more support in facing the unpleasant truths.
As you focus on the positive aspects of your life, I invite you today to search for the experiences and people which when remembered bring a genuine smile on your face.
People who have positively influenced you
Can you list all experiences which bring a smile on your face? (make a list)
What is the reason you enjoyed that experience?
What made it so special?
Have you tried to recreate it?
If yes, has it brought the same joy?
Have you expressed your emotions towards this experience with anyone?
Who would you like to share it with and why?
What do you feel when you think about this experience?
Do you feel how thinking about that experience makes your body feel? Describe your sensations.
Experiences who have positively influenced you
Can you list all the people whose memories bring a smile on your face? (make a list)
What is the reason you value this person?
How do they make you feel?
Have you told them how they make you feel?
Have you been able to express how you appreciate them?
If you have not, what would you tell them?
How influential was this person in your life?
Would you like to share this information with someone and why?
Do you feel how thinking about that person makes your body feel? Describe your sensations.
What is in it for you?
The broader our understanding of why certain people and experiences we admire, the easier it is to comprehend the rationale and try to recreate it in our life. Of course if going through your memories brings another question you would like to analyze, please add it to your journal. I hope you were able to realize that reminiscing about people we love and experiences we cherish has a soothing effect on our nervous system and our body. Your breath became calmer, your heartbeat rhythm stabilized.
Maybe you haven’t thought about these people for a while and now have experienced little joy. Maybe some of the people on your list are not alive and it brought you sadness.
Maybe you have realized that you never got a chance to tell them how you cherish their presence.
Maybe you have experienced the love they once shared with you.
Whatever are your observations and conclusions might be, pay attention to what your mind and body are trying to tell you. It is beneficial for our wellbeing to pay close attention to our vehicle and the energy which drives it. Therefore we gain knowledge and experience every time we slow down to understand what is moving us. As with things we like, the result of this exercise will be added into your inventory of positive living. Remember that each time life gets a little hard.
I hope this was insightful and made you think about many positive people and experiences you have in your life.
Tomek
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